This post is part of an ongoing series on the books that I have read as part of my continual professional development (CPD). All of my CPD posts are available at the following link: Continual Professional Development
A Strategic Technology Consultant’s Perspective
As a technology consultant, I’m constantly seeking insights that can help teams thrive, particularly within the dynamic landscape of software development. I’ve found that leadership principles, often drawn from fields outside of technology, offer surprisingly relevant and powerful frameworks for navigating the challenges of modern workplaces. Brené Brown’s “Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts” has been a particularly impactful read, offering a roadmap for courageous leadership built on vulnerability, empathy, and connection. This post shares some of the key lessons I gleaned from the book, focusing on quotes that resonated deeply with my experience helping technology teams succeed. I believe these principles are crucial for fostering high-performing, sustainable teams, especially in the demanding world of software engineering.
Listen with Passion
The ability to truly listen is often underestimated in leadership. We tend to focus on formulating our responses while someone else is speaking, missing the nuances of their message. Psychologist Harriet Lerner reminds us that we should approach listening with the same eagerness and curiosity we want to be heard. As Brown states:
As Psychologist Harriet Lerner teaches, to listen with the same passion with which we want to be heard.
This isn’t just about hearing the words; it’s about striving to understand the emotions, experiences, and perspectives behind them. In a technology environment, this translates to actively soliciting feedback from developers, understanding their concerns about project timelines, technical debt, or team dynamics. It means creating a safe space where individuals feel comfortable sharing their thoughts without fear of judgement, and demonstrating that their input is valued.
Connection is Key
In the technology sector, it’s easy to get caught up in technical details and project deadlines, sometimes overlooking the human element. However, effective leadership hinges on building genuine connections with the people you lead. Daring leaders must care for and be connected to the people they lead. This isn’t about being a friend; it’s about demonstrating empathy, understanding, and a genuine interest in their well-being.
Daring leaders must care for and be connected to the people they lead.
When team members feel seen and supported, they’re more likely to be engaged, productive, and committed to the team’s success. This is particularly important in technology, where burnout is a significant concern. Taking the time to connect with individuals on a personal level, understanding their aspirations, and acknowledging their challenges can foster a stronger, more resilient team.
Asking the Right Questions
Support isn’t always about providing solutions; sometimes, it’s about asking the right questions to guide individuals toward their own answers.
What does support from me look like? What questions can I try to answer? Are there any stories you want to check out with me? And any other questions you have?
This approach empowers team members to take ownership of their work and develop their problem-solving skills. Instead of jumping in to fix things immediately, a leader can ask clarifying questions, offer resources, and create opportunities for collaboration. This fosters a culture of learning and growth, where individuals feel confident in their ability to navigate challenges. In a technology context, this could involve asking developers about the roadblocks they’re facing, exploring different approaches to a problem, or facilitating discussions to brainstorm solutions.
Embrace Failure as a Catalyst
Innovation is rarely a linear process; it often involves experimentation, setbacks, and ultimately, failure. There is nothing more uncertain than the creative process, and there is absolutely no innovation without failure. Creating a culture where failure is seen as a learning opportunity, rather than a cause for blame, is essential for fostering creativity and risk-taking.
There is nothing more uncertain than the creative process, and there is absolutely no innovation without failure. Show me a culture in which vulnerability is framed as weakness and I’ll show you a culture struggling to come up with fresh ideas and new perspectives.
This requires leaders to model vulnerability and openly share their own mistakes. In technology, this means encouraging developers to experiment with new technologies, even if the experiments don’t always succeed. It also means analysing failures to identify root causes and implement changes to prevent them from recurring. A culture of psychological safety, where people feel comfortable taking risks without fear of punishment, is a prerequisite for innovation.
💡 TIP
I also covered failure as a required step for innovation in Embracing Failure: A Key to Success in the Modern Workplace
Find Joy in the Process
The pursuit of goals can sometimes overshadow the importance of enjoying the journey.
The opposite of play is not work—the opposite of play is depression.
This quote reminds us that playfulness, curiosity, and a sense of humour are essential for maintaining well-being and fostering creativity. In a demanding field like technology, it’s easy to get caught up in the pressure to deliver results, but it’s important to create space for joy and connection. This could involve incorporating team-building activities, celebrating successes, or simply fostering a positive and supportive work environment. When people feel like they’re enjoying what they do, they’re more likely to be motivated, engaged, and resilient.
Empathy Requires Boundaries
Empathy is a powerful tool for leadership, but it’s crucial to practice it with healthy boundaries.
Empathy is connecting to the feeling under the experience, not the experience itself. If you’ve ever felt grief, disappointment, shame, fear, loneliness, or anger, you’re qualified.
It’s important to understand that empathy doesn’t mean taking on other people’s burdens or trying to fix their problems. Instead, it means actively listening, validating their feelings, and offering support without crossing professional boundaries. As Brown wisely points out:
If struggle is being down in a hole, empathy is not jumping into the hole with someone who is struggling and taking on their emotions, or owning their struggle as yours to fix. If their issues become yours, now you have two people stuck in a hole. Not helpful. Boundaries are important here.
Maintaining boundaries ensures that you can be a supportive leader without sacrificing your own well-being or becoming overwhelmed.
Prioritise Effectively
Trying to do too much at once is a recipe for overwhelm and inefficiency.
If you have more than three priorities, you have no priorities.
This quote from Jim Collins (used, several times, in Brown’s book) highlights the importance of focus and strategic prioritization. In a technology environment, this means carefully evaluating projects and initiatives to determine which ones align with the team’s goals and deliver the greatest value. It also means saying no to requests that are not essential or that would distract from core priorities. By focusing on a few key priorities, teams can avoid spreading themselves too thin and achieve meaningful results. This requires strong communication, clear expectations, and a willingness to make difficult decisions.
Show Up for Others
Leadership is about showing up for people, especially when they’re struggling.
Show up for people in pain and don’t look away.
This means being present, offering support, and creating a safe space for vulnerability. It’s about acknowledging their emotions, validating their experiences, and offering practical assistance when possible. In a technology environment, this could involve providing mentorship, offering encouragement during challenging projects, or simply being a listening ear. When people feel supported, they’re more likely to be resilient, engaged, and committed to the team’s success.
Ready to Transform Your Technology Team?
These quotes from “Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts” offer a powerful framework for building more courageous and compassionate leadership. By embracing vulnerability, fostering connection, and prioritizing empathy, you can create a workplace where technology teams thrive.
If you’re looking for support in implementing these principles within your technology organisation, I offer strategic technology consultation services to help you build high-performing teams and achieve your business goals.
Learn more about my services and get in touch here or use the contact form below. Let’s work together to create a more courageous and compassionate workplace.